Relationship ready, set, go
By Margaret, 02 December, 2013.
Have you ever asked yourself or a friend "Where are all the good Guys/Gals?" When single and hoping to meet a suitable partner, it can seem as though all of the Guys/Gals you would be interested in are taken. But let me reassure you they are out there. They are wondering where you are too!
If you feel as though there is no one out there for you, don't give up hope. The best thing to do is to make sure you are ready for when He/She turns up.
Sometimes we become so consumed with who we are looking for and the qualities that He/She must have that we neglect to think about what we would be bringing to the relationship. We forget to check on ourselves and our preparation, readiness or suitability for a relationship.
Are you even the type that someone would want to have a relationship with?
Do you give out warmth and friendliness?
Be aware of the signals you are sending out. Do you have a vibe that says “Talk to me, I am open to getting to know you" or do you give out a vibe that says “Approach me at your own risk”. Your potential partner may be deterred from even approaching you and speaking to you if the message you are giving out isn't warm and friendly.
Be conscious of the message you are giving out. Ask a good trustworthy friend for an opinion, And be open to the answer you receive. Hopefully they will be honest and it could make a huge difference if you are unaware of the impression you are giving out.
Do you look the best you can?
We are all more than our looks. But men in particular are not great at being intuitive at reading personalities. They are visual creatures. So they are going to need to be attracted to what they see first. Then they will have a chance to get to know your wonderful personality. It's important that your presentation is the best it can be. They are wired to be attracted to the physical and will have a chance to get to know you for who you really are, if they are pleased with your appearance. Also, it is only fair that if you are looking to meet someone who looks after themselves, keeps fit and maintains their appearance, you should bring the same to the relationship.
The relationships you have with your family and friends will tell a potential partner a lot about you. We have all heard the saying that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats his Mother. Equally, the level of commitment a lady has to her parents, siblings and friends, can say a lot about the type of partner she is likely to be.
If a lady is critical of her family, gossips about her girlfriends and critisises her ex's, a potential new partner will be making assumptions about the type of partner she would be. And it may not be very flattering.
Self-confidence is said to be one of the most attractive qualities you can possess. Confidence is self-assurance and knowing you can identify positive things about yourself. You know that you are capable and lovable. It is very different to arrogance.
Self confident people have a self awareness. They are aware of their strengths as well as their weaknesses. They acknowledge any weaknesses they have, but use their strengths to achieve the goals that are important to them.
Woman are drawn to a man who is self assured and knows what he wants out of life. Most women will avoid a wimpy indecisive man , but also a controlling bully as well.
Men are drawn to a woman who knows who she is and what she is about.
Neither should look for a relationship because they need the other to feel complete. It isn't healthy to expect a partner to supply a quality that is missing in us.
Doing the ground work
None of us is perfect and often it is our frailties and little quirks that make us attractive. We may look for opposing strengths in a partner and this may have some merit. But it may pay to take some time and look at ourselves. Are we able to bring to a relationship that which we are asking for in a partner? This could include the areas of physically, emotionally, intellectually, financially. If after checking in on ourselves we find we aren't up to scratch, are we ready to at least do some work on making ourselves a little more ready? It makes sense to play fair in the game of love.
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