What has science discovered about our behaviour?

By Margaret, 24 November, 2014.
I often speak to people who say, "I am a bit too shy and nervous to meet strangers." or "I'm not sure I would fit in with people I'm meeting." This would suggest that these people have resigned to believing they can't alter their perception of themselves or for that matter, their behaviour.

Science continues to make new discoveries about the brain and how we can retrain it.

In the 80's the Dalai Lama asked a group of world class neuroscientists if the mind could change the brain. His question, at the time, was to discover if we are in fact free. Does our brain direct us, or do we direct our brain? Are we a product of our childhood conditioning and wiring? Are we stuck with our genetics? Or do we have potential for personal growth and the ability to change our behaviour to achieve a different outcome? The scientists told the Dalia Lama that the mind cannot change the brain.

That was nearly 30 years ago, and we now know that the scientists were wrong.

Scientists now know that the brain responds to the mind. Whatever you persue can be achieved by mental practice. The term for this is neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity refers to the brain's ability to restructure itself after training or practise. With the knowledge that change is possible, we are able to decide and focus on ways we would like to grow instead of whether or not it's achievable.

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then is not an act, but a habit."~ Aristotle

There are a couple of ways that are promoted as being useful to assist in making new pathways in the brain. The first one is to put ourselves in situations where we will experience achieving the behaviour we wish to develop. So that we experience success in that area. The second is that even by imagining ourselves having success in the area we are pursuing (visualisation) has the very same effect on the brain as actually carrying it out.

It all comes back to practice and the knowledge that people of any age have the ability to learn new things and form new habits. So, what are you waiting for? If you'd like to develop new ways of being, you can retrain your brain and become competent in any social situation.

Our dinners are a wonderful tool to use to develop your skill as a single person in a fun, relaxed atmosphere with no pressure. You'll meet singles that desire genuine friendships and genuine relationships.


Margaret Newitt



1300 885 311


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